Happy Mothers Day!
Mothers Day has always been an important day to me. I remember as a young girl how we would go shopping for that special gift for mama. I love my mama and we have had lots of good times. My mama was always a fun mama, she allowed us to have fun and enjoy life, but when playtime was over and it was time to be good, mama laid down the law. She didn’t put up with nonsense.
My mama raised two boys that both outgrew her in their teen years, yet they still gave her the respect that she deserved. Both of those boys are now Preachers, proclaiming the wonderful Word of our Lord and Savior. Mama also raised 4 girls, and for that she deserves a medal.
My mama didn’t hope that we would serve the Lord, my mother demanded that we were going to serve the Lord. You may think that is too hard, but my mother wasn’t willing that any of her children die and go to hell and I believe not only did she fight for us, but she prayed for us.
I’m glad that my mother cared enough to fight not just for her children, but her grandchildren as well. She set up boundaries in our life that helped each one of us as we set boundaries for our children. Mama said many times, “ I set strict boundaries so if my children decide to step outside of the boundaries, they don’t go off in deep sin”, so these were set to protect our children as well.
God has given us one life to live and if we live nonchalantly then our life is in vain. My mother was determined that her children would serve the Lord.
I remember my mama always wanted to one day buy a large piece of property and all of her kids build a house on that property. Mama dreamed of living where her grandkids could run and roam over the land and come to her house anytime they wanted. But mama didn’t raise us to live on the same property, she raised us to
“Go into all the world and preach the gospel to every creature” Mark 16:15
As many times in my life as I heard about her dream, I also heard her say, “I want my children to be in the center of Gods will. I’d rather they live in the jungles of Africa in the will of God, than to live next door to me.”
She meant it too. Does it hurt that we’re all apart, yes, I have seen her weep over not having her grandchildren close. I have seen the hurt in her eyes when she just wanted to see her son or daughter. I have been there when she was at times frustrated that everyone was so far apart, yet she always knew deep in her heart that everyone was right where God wanted them to be. And with that Mama was happy and at peace.
As I look over my life and I remember the days early in my marriage when I longed for a baby, it never actually occurred to me the great responsibility that a child would bring. To me, having a baby was exciting and having lots of babies was my plan. I am so thankful that God loves us enough to say “NO”.
I wanted to be a mother for many years and it seemed that I would never have that opportunity. When my time of motherhood actually came, it was quickly taken away through miscarriage. My heart was broken and I felt destroyed on the inside. Yet God had a bigger plan, a better plan. Seven months after losing my baby, I found out I was expecting, this time, God allowed me to mother this beautiful little girl. Through her God healed my brokenness, yet I had so much growing to do that he continued to break me.
After the loss of my grandmother, who was my very best friend, God gave me another beautiful baby girl and she helped me heal from this great loss. God always has a plan that is not even in our line of thinking. He doesn’t do things our way.
“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the Lord.” Isaiah 55:8
I lost two more babies and God showed me that even though I wanted a lot of babies, it wasn’t in his plan for me to raise those children. I still have them, they are just with him in heaven.
Looking at my beautiful girls I knew that God had great plans for them. I never felt that I was missing out on anything he had given me the desires of my heart, yet deep in my heart I felt a void. I was happy with my life and my family, and I would look at my girls and the overwhelming thought of raising them to be godly ladies and godly wives terrified me. The reality of “This is not playtime” hit me hard. I am not just playing house, these children are MY responsibility, to see that not only are they able to live well in society, but that they choose Christ and that they serve him and are godly mothers and have the ability to train their children.
OH MY!! BREATHE!!! BREATHE!! BREATHE!!
What an awesome responsibility this is to take in. And then in the middle of this overwhelming responsibility, we find out we have another child on the way. I almost fainted, I was in complete shock most of the day, but I was still able to pull off a pretty good surprise for my dear husband.
This baby was different, I want to be clear that I prayed for each one of my babies and I asked and begged God, but I had gotten satisfied with my girls and this baby was a HUGE surprise. We were thrilled, but I was shocked.
When we went to find out the gender of this baby, having two girls already I thought it would be nice to have a son, but I knew I’d be happy either way. On the ride home as I looked at the ultrasound picture and it said, “It’s A Boy” I just bursted into tears and told my husband that I realized the big responsibility to raise my girls, but they will have husbands one day to lead them, but this child will be the leader. He will be the one that makes the decisions for his family and who am I to raise this child? Yet I felt a stamp of approval from God, he had given me two daughters and now a son. How truly blessed I am.
So many times since having this conversation with my husband, I feel so inadequate. Most days I feel that I am failing my children in every way possible. Not enough playtime, not enough school time, not enough training, not enough sleep, not enough healthy food….I look in the mirror and I see an aging woman that although I am not old, I am older that I was when they laid that first baby girl in my arms. I thought I had all the time in the world to raise her just the way I wanted to, yet I have let 15 years slip through my fingers like sand. She is absolutely brilliant and everything I have wanted her to be and so much more. My second daughter is 8 and it seems like just yesterday I was counting her fingers and toes, and my son, a strong little man at only 2 years old, he has the whole world out in front of him, I pray he wins them all to Jesus.
I want my children to love the Lord, I want my children to serve the Lord. This is not about me, It is completley about HIM. God gave me these children, he gave me daughters to raise to be strong women, wives and mothers, He gave me a son to raise to be a strong leader and a husband that will lead his family into all truth.
As my children grow I want them to know that they have a mother that loves them and wants them to serve Christ. I want them to lean on him for their every need. I want them to understand that this life will soon pass and that one day we will stand before God.
To be honest, I dread the day I have to stand before God, I have wasted so much time. I have let so many down. I have missed so many souls. It will not be a happy moment when we give an account for the deeds we have done on this earth. I hope that God will be pleased with me, And as a mother I don’t need gifts and flowers, I don’t need to be told how good of a mom I am, I just want to hear God say to my children. “Well Done”. If God is pleased then that is all that really matters.
So on this American Mothers Day, Let me say, “I’m not perfect, I make loads of mistakes, we all do, yet those children that God put into your care, are for you to raise them to serve Him. Mothers we don’t have time to waste.
Will you hear him say, “Well Done”?
”... Well done, thou good and faithful servant: thou hast been faithful over a few things, I will make thee ruler over many things: enter thou into the joy of thy lord.” Matthew 25:21