Delighting In Our Children
I have always believed this, but my pastors message sparked a thought with me tonight. Our pastor preached tonight about several thing but he talked a little while about the lack of respect in children these days and how parents don’t control their kids and don’t discipline them.
It is tough dealing with a disobedient child, or a child that is stubborn, so My thought was.. How many parents are actually “delighting in their children”? Is your child or children a true joy or are you looking for ways to get the “out of your hair”?
You see so many children nowadays have no respect for their parents, school teachers, and much less the man of God. The bible says in 2 Timothy 3:1-2 “This know also, that in the last days perilous times shall come. For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, ”
There is so much in these two verses that could be talked about, but In verse 2 it says, “disobedient to parents”. We are seeing so much of this lately, I am amazed at how kids treat their parents today. I have seen and heard some terrible things lately and although I know with young children there is a time for training. We have to teach our children the right way to say things or the right attitude to have. They are not born with this knowledge, they have to be taught. So, as a mother this is my job to teach my children obedience. You might ask, at what point do I start teaching them? Many parents believe that a little baby doesn’t understand, but when my oldest was in my womb I talked to her all the time, I was so excited to be having a baby, but at times she would get in my ribs and it would hurt so bad and I would barely tap where she was and say, “move you are hurting mama” and she would move. You may think this was coincidence, she may not have understood my words, but she understood what I wanted her to do, because she moved. Each night at bedtime, my husband would talk to her and before he would go to sleep he would tap my belly three times and say, “I love you”. After several weeks of him doing this, she started responding to his voice with pushing my belly with her foot three times, when she was born, she was in the bassinet crying and my husband spoke to her and she kicked out her leg, three times. Again you may think this is coincidence, but I believe we were training her before she was even born. We continued our training right after she was born, she wasn’t allowed to cry in church, now we didn’t spank a newborn, but a tap on the diaper got her attention, I only took her out of church a few times due to her crying out or getting in trouble as she got older. The hardest part of training our children is discipline and consistency in parents, both of these are my weakness. I don’t know everything about raising children, I don’t know everything about teaching them obedience and respect, but I do know that when I am consistent in teaching them anything, they pick it up.
So back to the question, how old do you start training them? Immediately would be my answer. See you are not just training and teaching your children so they will obey and respect you as their parent, this training is what will help them when God speaks to them. How will they respond to God in obedience, if they won’t obey you? How will they respect God, if they don’t respect you? God gave us a process in His word on how to deal with our children. The bible tells us that “Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child;but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him.”
What is foolishness? (Foolishness means: to be perverse, which is to be directed away from what is right or good; self willed or stubborn; cranky ) So here we have the perfect definition of any child from the age of 0-18+ I have actually heard parents say, I have spanked my kids and it don’t work. The problem I have with this is that the bible says it will work, so if what you are doing isn’t working it is you that is the problem. Gods word is true and it works.
The rod of correction must be used in order to have order in your home and in the church. It’s amazing to me how many parents and I include myself in this one, excuse their child’s behavior and just give a talk or they ignore them completely, when the word of God clearly says, “THE ROD OF CORRECTION” and this is for disobedient, wrong behavior,stubbornness and crankiness. Wow.. I do believe one thing, a mother and fathers job would be much more simple and easy if they would just discipline the biblical way. I have seen a mother fight with her toddler and try to make them obey and then get frustrated herself when they don’t obey. They won’t obey just because you say so, not until you put the rod of correction to use. You see Proverbs 29:15 says, “The rod and reproof give wisdom:but a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame.” The rod here is a stick or a branch.. We call it a switch The word reproof means .. Correction by words So you see, this isn’t about you as a parent getting respect or making a child obey, this is about being able to delight in your children as they are pleasant to be around. The bible says in this verse that “the rod and reproof give wisdom…” Wisdoms here means, good sense, skillful, make wiser” so you are creating a person that will be an upstanding citizen, someone that makes good choices in life and most importantly, when Jesus comes knocking on their hearts door, they will answer Yes, and they will receive His gift of salvation. What a great reward when we are able to delight our children. When we can delight in them then we know Christ can delight in them. The bible says in Psalms 127:3 “Lo, children are an heritage of the Lord:and the fruit of the womb is his reward.” It amazes me how good God is, you see in this verse, It doesn’t say that children are our reward, they are HIS reward, they are HIS heritage. So it doesn’t matter if He gives you 1 child, 10 children or no children, it is still all about The Lord. But if we as parents will do our job and make our children obey and be respectful, that is just an added reward. I love my girls and I am learning to delight in them as they are learning and growing in their obedience and respect.
Last word for thought: If your children embarrass you in public or are disruptive to a meeting due to lack of discipline, most people don’t get upset at the child, but the parent. When you do your job at home, it is seen in public.